I think it’s safe to say my quarter life crisis is over. I no longer stress about decisions I’ve made growing up. At the same time, though, I feel at a loss sometimes. Right now I have more jobs than I know what to do with. Almost exactly two years ago I left my stable job in insurance to pursue my dream of teaching. I guess God had other plans for me, because that dream didn’t work out. Now a little over a year later I’m trying to decide where my life will take me. I currently work as a paralegal doing liquor law. In a few weeks I’ll start training as a beach body coach. I also write SEO Copy and do some basic account management for my husband’s business. In January I start school to become a certified paralegal which, will be followed by a program to be a certified legal document preparer program. I never thought I’d be working in so many areas at the same time. I never wanted to own my own business and now I’ve got my hands in three. It’s a little overwhelming and some days are very hard. Between working, being a wife, and trying to stay on top of all of my goals, I don’t know how I keep up with things; yet alone how I’ll fit school in the mix.
I think back to one of my favorite biblical based quote that isn’t in the bible at all: “God never said it would be easy, he just promised it’d be worth it.” I can be anxious, I can be neurotic and I’m full of self doubt on the inside. I worry that I’ll never find time to raise kids and that by following three dreams I’ll never fully succeed at any of them. I’m not sure when it happened but I came to the realization I’d never be happy in the corporate world. I simply wasn’t built to sit at a desk and stare at the walls 40 hours a week, while putting out one fire after the next. I was not made to be placed in a cubical. As much as I resist going back to a corporate job, there is a security and comfort in employee sponsored insurance for everything (health, dental, vision, life, disability and retirement). There’s a comfort in a guaranteed pay check. I seek stability and certainty yet, my current endeavors offer none. In a strange way, everything all sort of came together for me. I’m still in my 20’s barely 5 years out of college and I’m finally feeling a sense of accomplishment. I can take pride in what I do because it makes me happy. I don’t dread getting up on Monday morning because my weeks are more fluid. I have the perfect mix between stimulation and down time; I also don’t have to wait till the weekend to make time for an outing. I guess I hope to encourage all of you, life is hard and beautiful, exciting and challenging, fun and scary all at the same time, and none of us are gonna make it out alive. Enjoy it while it lasts and do what makes you happy.